I cannot tell you how many times I’ve been consulting with a new business owner and hear them say …
“(Name) said I’ll never make a profit from this perhaps I need to wait.” or something very similar.
This breaks my heart because I know that this truly remarkable individual’s dream has just been treated like they are worthless and quite possibly will now give up and walk away from their dream or at the very least it will stall their plans to see their dream realized. All because of a dream crusher.
Are you a dream crusher?
If you are, then I implore you to step back and take a look at why are you really saying those hurtful words to the person you are supposed to be supporting. Look in the mirror and ask yourself why am I doing this to them? You may think you are protecting them, but in most cases you are not – even if that is your intention. All you are doing is crushing their dream. Who are you to say you cannot do it? And that is what you are saying to them every time you question their dream. Yes, starting a business is scary business indeed which is exactly why they NEED YOU to be supportive and not a dream crusher.
I get that not all businesses succeed, but it is not my place nor is it yours to tell someone they cannot fly. Tweet This! I am a single a mom who had multiple obstacles standing in front of me when I started my business including a lack of support. I had no money, no knowledge of how to start a business, used and broken equipment, and I was all alone doing this. I did it anyway. I’m coming up on 5 years in business. Creativity, steadfastness, a million sleepless nights, hard work, and there were times I was downright terrified it wasn’t going to work but I was determined to make it work. With my faith in God I pushed forward and I’m still here and growing stronger every day.
Had I given in and listened to naysayers or dream crushers I would not be here today. I chose to listen to only those who were going to be supportive of my dream. I surrounded myself with positive influencers and got the support I needed when I needed it, but not everyone has so much tenacity and they need YOU the person they look to as their biggest supporter to cheer them on. Instead of saying you cannot do it … they need to hear you say, “That’s fantastic! Can you tell me more about your plans?” And I promise you they will tell you ALL about it. They long to discuss it with you, but you have to show them you are interested and supportive.
Even with all my tenacity I longed for people to share my plans with. People I could bounce ideas off of. People who would sometimes say to me, “Wow!” or “That’s amazing!” or “You’re doing a great job!” Yes, I know it seems vain, but I am human just like you. It feels good to receive validation for all our hard work and especially for our dreams. Sometimes we just need encouragement. Someone to say, “You got this!” I learned to encourage myself by saying things like, “God’s got this!” or reminding myself that I can do all things through Christ. You know God has my back and sometimes I had to remind myself of that, but let me tell you it would’ve been easier if someone was behind me encouraging me, supporting me, and reminding me that I can do this! Which is why I had to go out and create my own support system, but if you are already someone’s support system then by all means be there support system.
So please STOP and THINK before you speak next time to someone who is trying to share their dream with you! You very well could be the difference between their success and their failure.
PS If you are a small business owner who is dealing with a dream crusher. Try to have a talk with them and explain how it’s affecting you. Put a good support system into place. Find the right people. Connect with a mentor, get a good business coach, and when you are ready a good virtual assistant can be a good source for encouragement and support as well as assist you putting all the pieces together.